Watch this SHORT video:
http://www.foodnetwork.com/unwrapped6/video/index.html
"Who can find a virtuous woman? For her worth is far above rubies." ~Proverbs 31:10
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Quotes
"A women's heart should be so lost in God that a man must seek God in order to find her.."
~Unknown
~Unknown
Friday, August 20, 2010
Babysitter Websites
A Guide to the Business of Babysitting (The University of Illinois Extension): http://urbanext.illinois.edu/babysitting/
Kids Health Article: http://kidshealth.org/teen/school_jobs/jobs/babysit.html
Kids' Turn Central: http://www.kidsturncentral.com/topics/issues/babysitting1.htm
Babysitting Tips: http://www.babysittingtips.net/
- Includes information on:
- Safety Tips
- Behavior & Guidance
- Feeding
- Bathing
- Diapering
- Planning Activities
- Communicating with parents (your own and the children you watch)
- Information you need
- Ages & Stages of Children
- Making Your Own Flyer
Kids Health Article: http://kidshealth.org/teen/school_jobs/jobs/babysit.html
Kids' Turn Central: http://www.kidsturncentral.com/topics/issues/babysitting1.htm
Babysitting Tips: http://www.babysittingtips.net/
Babysitter Tips--Activity Books
If you are going to be watching children that are 1.5-3yrs old, here are GREAT books that are FULL of activities for you to do while the parents are out:
1. Rainy Day Activities for Kids. Buy HERE for $1.00!!
2. The Toddler Busy Book
Buy it at AMAZON.COM
or
Buy it at HALF.COM
This book contains 365 activities (one for each day of the year) for one-and-a-half to three-year-olds using things found around the home. It shows parents and day-care providers how to:
* Prevent boredom during the longest stretches of indoor weather with ideas for indoor play, kitchen activities, and arts and crafts projects.
* Stimulate a child's natural curiosity.
* Encourage a child's all-around growth with ideas for fun music, food, water, and outdoor activities.
* Keep toddlers occupied...
1. Rainy Day Activities for Kids. Buy HERE for $1.00!!
2. The Toddler Busy Book
or
Buy it at HALF.COM
This book contains 365 activities (one for each day of the year) for one-and-a-half to three-year-olds using things found around the home. It shows parents and day-care providers how to:
* Prevent boredom during the longest stretches of indoor weather with ideas for indoor play, kitchen activities, and arts and crafts projects.
* Stimulate a child's natural curiosity.
* Encourage a child's all-around growth with ideas for fun music, food, water, and outdoor activities.
* Keep toddlers occupied...
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
17 Things You Should Always Know as a Babysitter
http://www.qualityhealth.com/featured-article-segment?fa=56&rf=47624&mc=MTc5MTQ3MzY.&ct=40441
For many parents, leaving their children with a babysitter for the first time can be a nerve-wracking experience. But while such concerns are valid, cases like these represent only a small fraction of babysitter problems. The more common danger, according to experts, is unintentional injury due to a lack of information about the kinds of problems that can arise and what to do in case of an emergency.
Sitter Safety 101
Although no one can care for a child the way a parent does, there are steps you can take to ensure safety while the parents are away from home. To help make you a better babysitting candidate, the University of Michigan Health System recommends that you take the American Red Cross Babysitter Class.
Babysitter Guidelines
In addition, the American Red Cross recommends communicating the following do's and don'ts to ensure a smooth babysitter experience:
For many parents, leaving their children with a babysitter for the first time can be a nerve-wracking experience. But while such concerns are valid, cases like these represent only a small fraction of babysitter problems. The more common danger, according to experts, is unintentional injury due to a lack of information about the kinds of problems that can arise and what to do in case of an emergency.
Sitter Safety 101
Although no one can care for a child the way a parent does, there are steps you can take to ensure safety while the parents are away from home. To help make you a better babysitting candidate, the University of Michigan Health System recommends that you take the American Red Cross Babysitter Class.
Babysitter Guidelines
Here, the 17 things you should always know from parents:
- Both parent's full names.
- Contact information where they can be reached, as well as their cell phone number.
- The child(ren)'s full name, age, date of birth, height, weight, hair color, and eye color (in case the sitter and child get separated).
- The phone number and address of the house where you will watch the child(ren), as well as directions to it.
- The name and phone number of the family doctor or pediatrician.
- Emergency-services numbers and the poison-control hotline number.
- Location of all the exits in the house.
- Location of first-aid supplies, as well as the fire extinguisher, fuse box, and flashlights.
- Contact information for neighbors, friends, and family.
- Special medical information, especially regarding food and drug allergies.
- The time at which you can expect the parent(s) to be home.
- The child's bedtime and bedtime routine (if the child is a baby, be sure to place the child on his or her back to sleep, not on the side or stomach).
- Any foods or drinks that should, or should not, be given to the child.
- Any medications that should, or should not, be given to the child.
- How your the should be handled if he or she misbehaves.
- How to calm the child if he or she is upset (if your the is a baby, be sure to never to shake the child under any circumstances).
- Other special instructions regarding the child, family pets, etc.
In addition, the American Red Cross recommends communicating the following do's and don'ts to ensure a smooth babysitter experience:
- Do learn first aid and CPR.
- Do keep the doors locked, even while you're outside.
- Do call 911 if someone suspicious comes to the door.
- Do be on the lookout for potentially dangerous items around the home.
- Do keep matches, lighters, and candles away from the child at all times.
- Do turn on outside lights in the evening.
- Do be familiar with basic food safety, including choking and food-poisoning safety guidelines.
- Don't leave the house with the child unless you have permission.
- Don't talk for long periods on the phone.
- Don't open the door to strangers, including delivery people.
- Don't ever tell a stranger, even on the phone, that you are the babysitter.
- Don't stay anywhere you feel unsafe, smell smoke, or hear a fire or smoke alarm.
- Don't go outside to check on something strange, such as an unusual noise.
- Don't ever leave the child alone in the bathtub, not even for a second.
Quotes on Self-respect
http://www.quotegarden.com/self-respect.html
He that respects himself is safe from others; he wears a coat of mail that none can pierce.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
In my day, we didn't have self-esteem, we had self-respect, and no more of it than we had earned.
~Jane Haddam
A man [or woman] can stand a lot as long as he can stand himself.
~Axel Munthe
They cannot take away our self-respect if we do not give it to them.
~Mahatma Gandhi
Self-respect cannot be hunted. It cannot be purchased. It is never for sale. It cannot be fabricated out of public relations. It comes to us when we are alone, in quiet moments, in quiet places, when e suddenly realize that, knowing the good, we have done it; knowing the beautiful, we have served it; knowing the truth we have spoken it.
~Whitney Griswold
I care not so much what I am to others as what I am to myself. I will be rich by myself, and not by borrowing.
~Michel de Montaigne
You punch me, I punch back. I do not believe it's good for ones self-respect to be a punching bag.
~Edward Koch
Respect yourself and others will respect you.
~Confucius
Respecting yourself means listening to your body and emotions continuously. Then acting beyond a linear logic to achieve ones goals.
~Author Unknown
He that respects himself is safe from others; he wears a coat of mail that none can pierce.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
In my day, we didn't have self-esteem, we had self-respect, and no more of it than we had earned.
~Jane Haddam
A man [or woman] can stand a lot as long as he can stand himself.
~Axel Munthe
They cannot take away our self-respect if we do not give it to them.
~Mahatma Gandhi
Self-respect cannot be hunted. It cannot be purchased. It is never for sale. It cannot be fabricated out of public relations. It comes to us when we are alone, in quiet moments, in quiet places, when e suddenly realize that, knowing the good, we have done it; knowing the beautiful, we have served it; knowing the truth we have spoken it.
~Whitney Griswold
I care not so much what I am to others as what I am to myself. I will be rich by myself, and not by borrowing.
~Michel de Montaigne
You punch me, I punch back. I do not believe it's good for ones self-respect to be a punching bag.
~Edward Koch
Respect yourself and others will respect you.
~Confucius
Respecting yourself means listening to your body and emotions continuously. Then acting beyond a linear logic to achieve ones goals.
~Author Unknown
What will a girl take?!
On July 3rd I was at a 4th of July celebration in a fairly small town (there was, at most, 200 people in attendance). I was walking about the grounds on several occasions during the day and saw a lot of high school students. However, my eye kept stopping on one particular high school "couple". They laughed, they cuddled, they held hands, they talked...but one thing that they did really stuck out to me.
For the sake of privacy, I will call them Todd and Kelly.
Every so often I would see Todd be "playful" with Kelly. He would push her, push her, and knock her down onto her butt. The whole time, Kelly would be laughing.
Can you tell what is ok with this? Can you tell me what's wrong with this?
"It's affection" someone might say. "They are just "messin' or playin' around," someone else might say.
I have to know: Since when it is ok for a guy to push a young woman (a.k.a. "girl")? Since when is it ok for him to knock her to the ground and humiliate her for the sake of "playing around"? Since when is it ok for a young woman to tolerate any guy who does that on purpose?
I could not help but feel sorry for Kelly. She was tolerating a relationship where a guy was expressing his dominance. There is no respect there. One minute they were hugging and displaying typical high school affection. The next minute Todd was pushing Kelly onto her butt.
So my big question is this: WHY IS KELLY STILL "DATING" TODD AFTER THE FIRST INTENTIONAL PUSH?
I also want to know why would Kelly laugh about being pushed to the ground? Who is to say Todd wouldn't do it again or do it harder the next time? Kelly, is the attention really worth it?
Most every girl wants attention from a guy. And it feels good when a guy likes you, doesn't it? He holds your hand, hugs you, and makes you feel close to him and cared for. Let's face it: it is in our blood, as girls, to long for affection, to be special to someone, and to have attention from a guy. It can make us feel important and that we mean something to someone.
If I were having a 1-on-1 conversation with Kelly, I might ask her about her family and her home life. That would give me an idea about why she is in the type of relationship she is in. I have found that girls who have fathers that are active in their lives and respect their daughters, tend to have relationships with friends, families, guys, and co-workers that are also respectful.
Do girls want respect or do they only want attention? I saw no respect from Todd to Kelly, but I saw Kelly get up off the ground and wrap her arms back around Todd. By doing this, she told him with her body language that it's ok for him to push her around (whether or not she likes it). When he was playfully pushing her away, it didn't matter to her because she would get back up and be his #1 girl again. If she was hurt inside, it didn't show. If she felt he was being rude, she didn't bat an eye. If she wanted him to show affection, she was getting it, but just the wrong kind.
As young women, we need to know who we are so that we can have confidence in ourselves. That confidence will produce self-respect. Self-respect will help us to choose meaningful and respectful relationships.
When I was in high school, I was so attracted to guys that I don't know why my parents ever let me out of the house. I was always looking at guys and sizing them up to be a potential boyfriend. One of the biggest red flags for me was if I ever saw a guy push a girl. I knew that if a guy pushed a girl, even playfully, that he had the great potential to do it when he was mad (such as in an argument, which EVERYONE has). I didn't want to be pushed around in any type, shape, or form.
That's NOT love or a respectful display of affection! That goes for girls also and pushing or hitting guys. Seriously, tell me one guy who is flattered by a girl who hits him, even if it is meant to be playful?!?!
Ephesians 5:28-29 says, "So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church."
Ephesians 5:33 says, "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."
I realize this passage is talking about married people, but if you look at it as between any guy and any girl, the principle of respect still applies. If a man is to love his wife as he loves himself, do you think a man would want or like to be pushed down? Certainly NOT! So why is it ok for a guy to push a girl? If a man is NOT pushing down his wife, then he deserves respect.
In regards to dating, if a guy ever pushes a girl, she should be stamped on the forhead as "UNDATEABLE!!", meaning you DON'T date him. You deserve to be respected, held high, esteemed, and cherished. Poor Kelly will get none of those things from Todd by tolerating his abuse. Even if she told him that she didn't like it, unless he stops after she tells him to, then it will NEVER stop.
Esteem means to be held in high regard. It is your worth and value to someone.
Respect is to to hold in esteem or honor, to show regard or consideration for, and to refrain from intruding upon or interfering with.
1 Peter 2:17 says "Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king."
1 Peter 3:7 says "Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered."
Can you see the pattern of respect in these verses? Can you see that it should be given and, therefore, received?
It might be difficult to end a relationship like Kelly and Todd's, depending on how deep into they are. If they did, Kelly would have a better chance at finding someone who would respect her, honor her, be kind to her, and appreciate her. She might be heart-broken from breaking up with Todd, but it would save her a lot of stress and save her from serious physical abuse down the road.
God cares about our hurts, ladies. He doesn't want to see us suffer. The Bible says in Matthew 11:28, "Come unto me all you that labor and are heavy burdened and I will give you rest." He wants to wrap us in his arms when we are hurting and comfort us.
1 Peter 5:7 says to "Cast all your cares upon him; for he cares for you." That is sooooo true!!! When we release the control over our emotions to God, He helps us to know how to deal with them.
For Kelly, casting off her emotions to God would allow her the strength to break up with Todd, to emotionally detatch from him, and to move on in life. God would be able to guide her about when to put her heart out there & when to hold it back. He would give her wisdom to know what guys to talk to and which ones to stay far away from.
Ladies, you deserve to be respected. You deserve to be cherished. You deserve to be held in high regard and high esteem. You deserve friends who will build you up and encourage you, yet help you in areas you need to improve (I'm not talking about what makeup or clothes you wear. I'm talking about character.). You deserve to know and believe that you were created special and unique for a purpose. You are never alone unless you choose to be a lone.
I pray that you will see how beautiful you are inside and out. I pray that you will believe that you deserve respect and that you will seek out relationships that bring you that. I pray that you will know that if no one in your life makes you feel loved, that you will know in your heart that God loves you and that I love you!
If you are dating a guy who is not showing respect to you publicly and privately and you wish to break it off, ask for help from a trusted adult and support from friends. Remember, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me," Philippans 4:13
For the sake of privacy, I will call them Todd and Kelly.
Every so often I would see Todd be "playful" with Kelly. He would push her, push her, and knock her down onto her butt. The whole time, Kelly would be laughing.
Can you tell what is ok with this? Can you tell me what's wrong with this?
"It's affection" someone might say. "They are just "messin' or playin' around," someone else might say.
I have to know: Since when it is ok for a guy to push a young woman (a.k.a. "girl")? Since when is it ok for him to knock her to the ground and humiliate her for the sake of "playing around"? Since when is it ok for a young woman to tolerate any guy who does that on purpose?
I could not help but feel sorry for Kelly. She was tolerating a relationship where a guy was expressing his dominance. There is no respect there. One minute they were hugging and displaying typical high school affection. The next minute Todd was pushing Kelly onto her butt.
So my big question is this: WHY IS KELLY STILL "DATING" TODD AFTER THE FIRST INTENTIONAL PUSH?
I also want to know why would Kelly laugh about being pushed to the ground? Who is to say Todd wouldn't do it again or do it harder the next time? Kelly, is the attention really worth it?
Most every girl wants attention from a guy. And it feels good when a guy likes you, doesn't it? He holds your hand, hugs you, and makes you feel close to him and cared for. Let's face it: it is in our blood, as girls, to long for affection, to be special to someone, and to have attention from a guy. It can make us feel important and that we mean something to someone.
If I were having a 1-on-1 conversation with Kelly, I might ask her about her family and her home life. That would give me an idea about why she is in the type of relationship she is in. I have found that girls who have fathers that are active in their lives and respect their daughters, tend to have relationships with friends, families, guys, and co-workers that are also respectful.
Do girls want respect or do they only want attention? I saw no respect from Todd to Kelly, but I saw Kelly get up off the ground and wrap her arms back around Todd. By doing this, she told him with her body language that it's ok for him to push her around (whether or not she likes it). When he was playfully pushing her away, it didn't matter to her because she would get back up and be his #1 girl again. If she was hurt inside, it didn't show. If she felt he was being rude, she didn't bat an eye. If she wanted him to show affection, she was getting it, but just the wrong kind.
As young women, we need to know who we are so that we can have confidence in ourselves. That confidence will produce self-respect. Self-respect will help us to choose meaningful and respectful relationships.
When I was in high school, I was so attracted to guys that I don't know why my parents ever let me out of the house. I was always looking at guys and sizing them up to be a potential boyfriend. One of the biggest red flags for me was if I ever saw a guy push a girl. I knew that if a guy pushed a girl, even playfully, that he had the great potential to do it when he was mad (such as in an argument, which EVERYONE has). I didn't want to be pushed around in any type, shape, or form.
That's NOT love or a respectful display of affection! That goes for girls also and pushing or hitting guys. Seriously, tell me one guy who is flattered by a girl who hits him, even if it is meant to be playful?!?!
Ephesians 5:28-29 says, "So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church."
Ephesians 5:33 says, "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."
I realize this passage is talking about married people, but if you look at it as between any guy and any girl, the principle of respect still applies. If a man is to love his wife as he loves himself, do you think a man would want or like to be pushed down? Certainly NOT! So why is it ok for a guy to push a girl? If a man is NOT pushing down his wife, then he deserves respect.
In regards to dating, if a guy ever pushes a girl, she should be stamped on the forhead as "UNDATEABLE!!", meaning you DON'T date him. You deserve to be respected, held high, esteemed, and cherished. Poor Kelly will get none of those things from Todd by tolerating his abuse. Even if she told him that she didn't like it, unless he stops after she tells him to, then it will NEVER stop.
Esteem means to be held in high regard. It is your worth and value to someone.
Respect is to to hold in esteem or honor, to show regard or consideration for, and to refrain from intruding upon or interfering with.
1 Peter 2:17 says "Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king."
1 Peter 3:7 says "Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered."
Can you see the pattern of respect in these verses? Can you see that it should be given and, therefore, received?
It might be difficult to end a relationship like Kelly and Todd's, depending on how deep into they are. If they did, Kelly would have a better chance at finding someone who would respect her, honor her, be kind to her, and appreciate her. She might be heart-broken from breaking up with Todd, but it would save her a lot of stress and save her from serious physical abuse down the road.
God cares about our hurts, ladies. He doesn't want to see us suffer. The Bible says in Matthew 11:28, "Come unto me all you that labor and are heavy burdened and I will give you rest." He wants to wrap us in his arms when we are hurting and comfort us.
1 Peter 5:7 says to "Cast all your cares upon him; for he cares for you." That is sooooo true!!! When we release the control over our emotions to God, He helps us to know how to deal with them.
For Kelly, casting off her emotions to God would allow her the strength to break up with Todd, to emotionally detatch from him, and to move on in life. God would be able to guide her about when to put her heart out there & when to hold it back. He would give her wisdom to know what guys to talk to and which ones to stay far away from.
Ladies, you deserve to be respected. You deserve to be cherished. You deserve to be held in high regard and high esteem. You deserve friends who will build you up and encourage you, yet help you in areas you need to improve (I'm not talking about what makeup or clothes you wear. I'm talking about character.). You deserve to know and believe that you were created special and unique for a purpose. You are never alone unless you choose to be a lone.
I pray that you will see how beautiful you are inside and out. I pray that you will believe that you deserve respect and that you will seek out relationships that bring you that. I pray that you will know that if no one in your life makes you feel loved, that you will know in your heart that God loves you and that I love you!
If you are dating a guy who is not showing respect to you publicly and privately and you wish to break it off, ask for help from a trusted adult and support from friends. Remember, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me," Philippans 4:13
How to Have a Meaningful Text Message Conversation
This article is taken from WikiHow.
This page was last modified 17:03, 18 August 2010 by Antoinette Acosta. Based on work by Eric, Jordan and Antoinette Acosta, wikiHow user(s) BrokenMusic and Flickety and Anonymous.
For many people, text messaging has become a primary (and in some cases, the only) means of communication between them and their friends and loved ones. As such, people have developed different ways to communicate using only 160 characters a page, sometimes in abundance or in scarcity. This article will help you if you are tired of having meaningless conversations with acquaintances, need to rid yourself of over-texters, and need to break out of the text slang and emoticon mold.
1. Text someone worth your time. Breaking the endless cycle of meaningless text message conversations starts with only talking to someone who offers interesting topics and firm opinions. Don't text someone just because you know that they'll be at home, bored, with nothing better to do than text you. If that means not text messaging who you usually do and having to wait longer for a response from someone worth your time, so be it.
2. Hold yourself to your own standards with other people. If someone constantly text messages you for the only purpose of having someone to text message, shake them off. Take longer to reply, give shorter answers, and stay ambiguous and passive in your answers. Eventually people will start to take the hint that you aren't going to put any effort into the conversation, so they will cease text messaging you as much as they can.
3. Ask open-ended questions in your conversations. If you're having a conversation with a person you enjoy talking to, do as much as you can to keep the conversation going. Ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer, leaving room for your opinion and the opportunity to discuss related topics.
Instead of asking "Do you like pop music?", ask "What are your favorite genres of music?" Questions like that not only spark conversations, but show that you have a genuine interest in the person and want them to elaborate on the topic.
4. Keep the conversation well-balanced. Don't ask questions or bring up topics just so you can give your opinion on them. It makes you look self-centered, and unless you show just as much enthusiasm in what the other person has to say, it will come off as annoying and rude. Avoid this by not only giving your opinion, but by also discussing or questioning the other person's opinion.
5. Avoid the one sentence/one word reply. Unless you are a person of very few words or can properly describe everything you need to say in one sentence, make a point of replying to a person's text message in at least two sentences. Worst of all is the "K" reply, which is now (sometimes) associated the sender being angry at the receiver, but not necessarily. It is often used in response to simple questions. Once you get to know a person's text message flow better, you'll be able to tell if you've said something to bore or anger them, but it is usually a one or two word answer.
If you are angry with a person, simply don't text them until you have had time to cool off and think about the situation. One word and one sentence replies will only make you more angry with the person you are text messaging as you continue your infuriating conversation.
6. Develop your own text messaging style. In the same sense that writers have different writing styles, consider creating your own standard of text messaging. A general sense of the English language should be upheld, because text message shorthand has become outdated and almost childish. Unlimited text messaging plans are now more affordable, so there's hardly any excuse to have sentences with a garble of letters, numbers and symbols that take the place of a five-letter word. As such, you do not always need a smiley face or heart after every sentence unless typing it makes you genuinely happy. Nobody will take you seriously if you have :) :] :D :P :/ :( >:( after everything you say.
7. Call the person to go deeper. If your conversation has taken an unexpected turn and either gotten deeper or more heated, ask to call the person and talk to them directly. Sometimes a person can better communicate their ideas out loud rather than picking the correct words to type and hesitating to see if they express their ideas clearly.
Meet in person, for a real connection. Don't let your thoughts and ideas be held back by text messaging, and stand firm on your opinions in whatever way you must. Not everything can be conveyed in 160 characters, and it's hard to beat actually being face-to-face with a person.
8. End on a good note. Do not randomly drop a conversation if it has been a good one. Doing so is the equivalent of hanging up on a person in the middle of a sentence. If the conversation has run its course, tell the person you have to go for the moment, or say good night if you need to get to sleep. Stay courteous and polite, so that the person can come to expect it and not be dismayed by randomly dropped conversations.
Warning!
This page was last modified 17:03, 18 August 2010 by Antoinette Acosta. Based on work by Eric, Jordan and Antoinette Acosta, wikiHow user(s) BrokenMusic and Flickety and Anonymous.
For many people, text messaging has become a primary (and in some cases, the only) means of communication between them and their friends and loved ones. As such, people have developed different ways to communicate using only 160 characters a page, sometimes in abundance or in scarcity. This article will help you if you are tired of having meaningless conversations with acquaintances, need to rid yourself of over-texters, and need to break out of the text slang and emoticon mold.
1. Text someone worth your time. Breaking the endless cycle of meaningless text message conversations starts with only talking to someone who offers interesting topics and firm opinions. Don't text someone just because you know that they'll be at home, bored, with nothing better to do than text you. If that means not text messaging who you usually do and having to wait longer for a response from someone worth your time, so be it.
2. Hold yourself to your own standards with other people. If someone constantly text messages you for the only purpose of having someone to text message, shake them off. Take longer to reply, give shorter answers, and stay ambiguous and passive in your answers. Eventually people will start to take the hint that you aren't going to put any effort into the conversation, so they will cease text messaging you as much as they can.
3. Ask open-ended questions in your conversations. If you're having a conversation with a person you enjoy talking to, do as much as you can to keep the conversation going. Ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer, leaving room for your opinion and the opportunity to discuss related topics.
Instead of asking "Do you like pop music?", ask "What are your favorite genres of music?" Questions like that not only spark conversations, but show that you have a genuine interest in the person and want them to elaborate on the topic.
4. Keep the conversation well-balanced. Don't ask questions or bring up topics just so you can give your opinion on them. It makes you look self-centered, and unless you show just as much enthusiasm in what the other person has to say, it will come off as annoying and rude. Avoid this by not only giving your opinion, but by also discussing or questioning the other person's opinion.
5. Avoid the one sentence/one word reply. Unless you are a person of very few words or can properly describe everything you need to say in one sentence, make a point of replying to a person's text message in at least two sentences. Worst of all is the "K" reply, which is now (sometimes) associated the sender being angry at the receiver, but not necessarily. It is often used in response to simple questions. Once you get to know a person's text message flow better, you'll be able to tell if you've said something to bore or anger them, but it is usually a one or two word answer.
If you are angry with a person, simply don't text them until you have had time to cool off and think about the situation. One word and one sentence replies will only make you more angry with the person you are text messaging as you continue your infuriating conversation.
6. Develop your own text messaging style. In the same sense that writers have different writing styles, consider creating your own standard of text messaging. A general sense of the English language should be upheld, because text message shorthand has become outdated and almost childish. Unlimited text messaging plans are now more affordable, so there's hardly any excuse to have sentences with a garble of letters, numbers and symbols that take the place of a five-letter word. As such, you do not always need a smiley face or heart after every sentence unless typing it makes you genuinely happy. Nobody will take you seriously if you have :) :] :D :P :/ :( >:( after everything you say.
7. Call the person to go deeper. If your conversation has taken an unexpected turn and either gotten deeper or more heated, ask to call the person and talk to them directly. Sometimes a person can better communicate their ideas out loud rather than picking the correct words to type and hesitating to see if they express their ideas clearly.
Meet in person, for a real connection. Don't let your thoughts and ideas be held back by text messaging, and stand firm on your opinions in whatever way you must. Not everything can be conveyed in 160 characters, and it's hard to beat actually being face-to-face with a person.
8. End on a good note. Do not randomly drop a conversation if it has been a good one. Doing so is the equivalent of hanging up on a person in the middle of a sentence. If the conversation has run its course, tell the person you have to go for the moment, or say good night if you need to get to sleep. Stay courteous and polite, so that the person can come to expect it and not be dismayed by randomly dropped conversations.
Warning!
- Avoid at all costs using text messages as a way to convey personal information, i.e. confessing your feelings to a person, asking someone out, breaking up with someone, sexting, and harassing a person. It's tacky and impersonal, as those things are conveyed better through face to face contact (although by no means should you harass a person).
- Do not, under any circumstances, forward a chain letter. It's pointless and fake, and will only annoy your friends who do not believe in those things. It is also illegal in some jurisdictions.
- Don't text and drive!
Monday, August 16, 2010
What do I ask?
When trying to get to know someone, anyone, it can be overwhelming to know what to ask them. There's so much to find out, yet sometimes it's difficult to think of things on the spot. Here are some great questions you can ask someone (guy or girl) when getting to know them (in no particular order):
Finish the sentence:
- One of mom’s traits I admired:
- Did you ever have any trouble with you mom growing up? What was it (in what area)?:
- One of dad’s traits you admired:
- Did you ever have any trouble with you mom growing up? What was it (in what area)?:
- On what occasion do you remember getting in trouble with your parents?:
- How do you usually eat dinner with your family?:
- A habit you picked up during your early years was?:
- You parents felt strongly about passing on what lessons?:
- Who in your family was more serious than the rest?:
- Who is your family was more fun than the rest?:
- Did you ever get a present from your parents that really sticks in your mind?:
- What do you remember about your first trip to the hospital?:
- What was one of your most memorable toys?:
- How does your family celebrate Christmas?:
- How does your family celebrate Thanksgiving?:
- How does your family celebrate __________ ?:
- Do you remember any of your great-grandparents?:
- What country are your ancestors from?:
- What do you like? What do you dislike?:
- Music, school subject, food, etc.
- What is your goal in life?:
- What family member are you the closest to?:
- Where did you grow up?:
- What school did you go to?:
- Where did you go to college?:
- Have you ever traveled anywhere?:
- What are some of your favorite things to do by yourself? To do with others?:
- What are some of your hobbies?:
- Who has been the biggest influence in your life?:
- What are your favorite snack foods?:
- What is your greatest fear?:
- What would you create if you were given an unlimited amount of time and money to do so?:
- Fun facts:
- Name:
- Age:
- Birthday:
- Nickname:
- Major:
- Hometown:
- Fav. color:
- Fav. candy/food:
- Fav. tv show:
- Fav. cartoon:
- Fav. soda:
- Fav. super hero:
- Fav. movie:
- What are you most excited for in college?:
- If you were a crayon, what color would you be?:
- If you could be a super hero, who would you be?:
Finish the sentence:
- This morning I woke up and thought...
- On a rainy day, I prefer to...
- My 3 biggest hobbies/interests are...
- I chose (insert college/job name) because...
- I chose (insert college/job name) because...
- When I get bored, I usually...One word that describes me would be:
- My grade school:
- My high school's hometown mascot:
- My favorite late night food:
- My favorite place to study on campus:
- If I could visit anyplace in the world it would be:
- My favorite web site is:
- If I didn't come to _________________, I would have enrolled at:
- My favorite professor is:
- My favorite class is:
- If I have a big project due, this motivates me to do a good job: At midnight on a Friday night, you would find me:
- My favorite sport is:
- My favorite sports team is:
- My favorite book is:
- My favorite movie is:
- My favorite snack food from The Huddle is:
- If I had a big project due, I reward myself by:
- My favorite member of ________ (musical group) is:
- My favorite game show is:
- My lucky number is:
- 5 years from now, I hope to be:
- 25 years from now, I hope to be:
- If I could live in any city in the USA, it would be:
- My favorite pizza topping(s) is:
- My favorite TV show is:
- The worst job I ever had was:
- The greatest __________ is:
- My most memorable moment at _______:
- I would relate my personality to this cartoon character:
- My personal motto is:
Friday, August 13, 2010
The Truth About Car Payments
I'll always have a car payment.
You've probably heard that comment before, right? You might have even said it yourself—with a defeated, woe-is-me tone of voice. So what's the deal? Are car payments really just a way of life?
Well, that's the normal way of thinking. But, as Dave always says: When it comes to money, normal is broke. You want to be weird, and weird people don't have car payments.
So how, exactly, do you live without a car payment?
Here's the deal. Recent statistics show that one-third of car buyers sign up for a six-year loan at an average interest rate of 9.6%. Among these buyers, the average price of the car is just over $26,000. This means that one-third of the cars you see on the road are dragging a $475 payment behind them.
The car dealer won't tell you that your awesome new car loses about 25% of its value the instant you drive it off the lot. After four years, your car has lost about 70% of its value!
What does that mean? After six years, you've paid almost $33,000 for a $26,000 car, which is now worth maybe $6,000. Not a good deal.
Here's a new plan. What if you bought a cheap $2,000 car just to get around for 10 months? Then you take that $475—the average car payment—save it every month, and pay for a new car (with cash!), instead of giving it to the bank.
After 10 months of doing that, you'll have $4,750 to use for that new ride. Add that to the $1,500–2,000 you can get for your old beater, and you have well over $6,000. That's a major upgrade in car in just 10 months—without owing the bank a dime!
But the fun doesn't end there. If you keep consistently putting the same amount of money away, 10 months later you would have another $4,750 to put toward a car. You could probably sell that $6,000 vehicle for about the same price you paid 10 months before, meaning you now have $11,000 to pay for a car, just 20 months after this whole process started.
The bottom line with this exercise is simply this—what could you do with that $475 if you weren't paying for the car every month? Anything you wanted!
Think about it this way: If you were to invest that $475 (remember, this is the average car payment in the U.S.) into a good mutual fund with a 12% rate of return, you would have over $100,000 in 10 years! At 20 years, you would have made $470,000. And at 30 years? That mutual fund would be worth $1.6 million!
The numbers will make your head spin, but it really just comes down to simple math. The less money you are spending on your car every month, the more money you have to put into other more important things: your kids' college fund, your retirement, and paying off any other debt you might have.
If you'll just follow this simple plan, your life could be dramatically different 10 years from now. You can live without a car payment!
Does this get you fired up? If so, check out Financial Peace University! Dave will teach you how to get on a plan for getting out of debt, saving for retirement, college, and real estate ... all debt free! Getting rid of car payments is just the beginning of changing your life forever, so get started today!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Preparing to be a Help Meet Chapter 3
Read Chapter 2 HERE.
Opening Q's:
Chapter 3 Summary--"The Prophet"
Genesis 1:26 "And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness". What is God's image? What is God's likeness? The word OUR is plural. Why does God refer to himself as more than one ("our")? What does the word likeness mean? What does the word image convey? This chapter answers these questions and gives you some understanding about men & God at the same time. It goes on to talk about why God refers to himself as OUR--he is 3 persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. I am not talking about the "Trinity", but the 3 individual persons that make up who God is.
Debi Pearl says, "As a man moves into his late twenties and early thirties his image will become much more pronounced". Your husband will fall into one of three categories: Prophet/Visionary, Priest/Steady Man, or King/Command Man. Once you can identify your type of man, it will help you better understand him and men in general. So do women reflect varied expressions of God's love? You will have to wait to find out the answer to this question for a few more chapters.
What is a Prophet-type? This is reflected in God's person as the Holy Spirit. It is also referred to as a Visionary-type. This type of man is a shaker, dreamer, and changer. They seek to change things from the way they are done in an effort to make it better. Prophet type men are more confrontational and always have a "cause". They communicate through words, music, writing, art, or actions. Debi Pearl says that "good-hearted prophets can be a lot of fun. They are never Mr. Dull. They can love with a passion and be aggressively loyal to their friends and family. They can take the lead in calling the world to repentance and showing then a path or righteousness." They focus on issues in varying derees.
This type of man will make a great boyfriend because he will focus totally on his sweetie--very romantic. You will become his passion and dream come true...until a short time after marriage. Then, as his new bride, you will feel abandoned as he turns his focus onto another "cause". Don't be offended, but you need to be ready to "ooh" and "aah" when he comes back to share his new vision and cause with you. When he does turn his attention back to you, all other women will be jealous because you will have the most romantic man around!
Understand this truth no matter what type of man you marry: You need a life, a vibrant life before your man comes on teh scene. A clingy useless wife that lacks drive, goals, ambitions, or a dream is just that--useless.
One unmarried commentator says, "a girl who lives a static life of waiting to be married is not attractive. Think what it conveys. 'I'll just sit here idly while waiting for someone to come and give me a purpose, and a house and money and food and make me happy and love me.' It's very needy. A mand wasnts a companion not a sympathy case."
These type of men were likely to conquer the Wild West because of their zeal for adventure. They are either rich or poor. The great part about a Prophet man is that he is creative and tenacious in the face of difficulty. The downside is that if they are not wise, they can be foolish by pushing their agenda onto people and forcing others to go their way. A stable and supportive woman helps to keep a Prophet productive rather than destructive. A Prophet type needs a woman with a positive outlook on life who is wise and prudent. She needs to learn how to be flexible and how to always be loyal to her man. ONCE YOU MARRY, your honor and allegiance belongs to YOUR MAN. [I capitalized those parts to stress that prior to marriage your allegance belongs to your parents or guardian, and then after marriage you must give your honor to your husband over your parents. This is not to say you cannot respect your parents and still honor them, but it will be different.]
Standing by his side, you will allow your husband to be confident that he is the man he is supposed to be. If you marry this type of man, learn to enjoy the ride. You will be his most important fan.
Other thoughts...
* He will talk and talk and talk and talk if he feels his honey approves of him. He will greatly need his wife to think objectively and use common sense.
* He will not notice what he eats, do don't be offended if he doesn't compliment your cooking.
* He is an initiator and provoker.
* He is intense on matters that can easily be blown out of proportion. So his wife must guard against negative conversation about people.
* He might spend money unwisely, leaving his wife feeling insecure. It will be vital that his wife remembers and stays focused on the fact that her treasure is not of this world. Treasure your husband and children, but don't mourn over moneytary and material things.
* He needs a woman who does not take offense easily.
Proverbs 24:3-4 "Through wisdom is a house builded; and by understanding it is established: and by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches."
Moral to the Story: Be flexible for your man.
A Caution:
Your most important job as a Prophet's wife is keeping a chaste and commonsense attitude and conversation (not bad-mouthing folks). Without it (keeping a chaste and commonsense attitude and conversation) your marriage will be miserable.
Your Treasure Chest:
* What can you do to prepare yourself to be a good wife of a Prophet?
* Will you start today praying for this wild man?
* Find all the statements (in this chapter) that list what you need to become to be a good help meet for a Prophet-type.
My Challenge to You
* Take a sheet of pretty paper and write a commitment: "I, ____________, make a commitment this day, ________, to honor, reverence, and obey my Prophet/Visionary husband for the man he is. I will appreciate his dreams; I will not listen to anyone bad mouthing him, and I will remember that I am his help meet to stand with him on all that he wants to accomplish," etc. Roll it up, tie it with a ribbon, and tuck it away in your Treasure Chest. If you marry a Prophet man, this document might save your husband a whole lot of irritation.
* How do you know if you would like to marry a Prophet/ Visionary type man? Ask yourself this: If you were married and one day he announced that he was moving the whole family to Iraq to minister, how would you respond?
* Read:
-One character trait is Faith: Hebrews 11:1-40
* Search your heart to discover your motive in what you say about others. What is your intent when you speak? Do you criticize in order to build yourself up and make others think that you are perfect?
* Do a study on the word shamefacedness and idleness. What do they mean? How do they apply in relationships? You will find out more about it in Chapter 4.
Opening Q's:
- What sort of man attracts you? Forceful, Gentle, Artistic. Thoughtful, Athletic, Brainy? (this is not necessaryily talking about what you WANT, but the type of man you find yourself most often drawn towards and attracted to)
- Did you know that God created men to express different aspects of His image?
- Which expression would best suit you?
Chapter 3 Summary--"The Prophet"
Genesis 1:26 "And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness". What is God's image? What is God's likeness? The word OUR is plural. Why does God refer to himself as more than one ("our")? What does the word likeness mean? What does the word image convey? This chapter answers these questions and gives you some understanding about men & God at the same time. It goes on to talk about why God refers to himself as OUR--he is 3 persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. I am not talking about the "Trinity", but the 3 individual persons that make up who God is.
Debi Pearl says, "As a man moves into his late twenties and early thirties his image will become much more pronounced". Your husband will fall into one of three categories: Prophet/Visionary, Priest/Steady Man, or King/Command Man. Once you can identify your type of man, it will help you better understand him and men in general. So do women reflect varied expressions of God's love? You will have to wait to find out the answer to this question for a few more chapters.
What is a Prophet-type? This is reflected in God's person as the Holy Spirit. It is also referred to as a Visionary-type. This type of man is a shaker, dreamer, and changer. They seek to change things from the way they are done in an effort to make it better. Prophet type men are more confrontational and always have a "cause". They communicate through words, music, writing, art, or actions. Debi Pearl says that "good-hearted prophets can be a lot of fun. They are never Mr. Dull. They can love with a passion and be aggressively loyal to their friends and family. They can take the lead in calling the world to repentance and showing then a path or righteousness." They focus on issues in varying derees.
This type of man will make a great boyfriend because he will focus totally on his sweetie--very romantic. You will become his passion and dream come true...until a short time after marriage. Then, as his new bride, you will feel abandoned as he turns his focus onto another "cause". Don't be offended, but you need to be ready to "ooh" and "aah" when he comes back to share his new vision and cause with you. When he does turn his attention back to you, all other women will be jealous because you will have the most romantic man around!
Understand this truth no matter what type of man you marry: You need a life, a vibrant life before your man comes on teh scene. A clingy useless wife that lacks drive, goals, ambitions, or a dream is just that--useless.
One unmarried commentator says, "a girl who lives a static life of waiting to be married is not attractive. Think what it conveys. 'I'll just sit here idly while waiting for someone to come and give me a purpose, and a house and money and food and make me happy and love me.' It's very needy. A mand wasnts a companion not a sympathy case."
These type of men were likely to conquer the Wild West because of their zeal for adventure. They are either rich or poor. The great part about a Prophet man is that he is creative and tenacious in the face of difficulty. The downside is that if they are not wise, they can be foolish by pushing their agenda onto people and forcing others to go their way. A stable and supportive woman helps to keep a Prophet productive rather than destructive. A Prophet type needs a woman with a positive outlook on life who is wise and prudent. She needs to learn how to be flexible and how to always be loyal to her man. ONCE YOU MARRY, your honor and allegiance belongs to YOUR MAN. [I capitalized those parts to stress that prior to marriage your allegance belongs to your parents or guardian, and then after marriage you must give your honor to your husband over your parents. This is not to say you cannot respect your parents and still honor them, but it will be different.]
Standing by his side, you will allow your husband to be confident that he is the man he is supposed to be. If you marry this type of man, learn to enjoy the ride. You will be his most important fan.
Other thoughts...
* He will talk and talk and talk and talk if he feels his honey approves of him. He will greatly need his wife to think objectively and use common sense.
* He will not notice what he eats, do don't be offended if he doesn't compliment your cooking.
* He is an initiator and provoker.
* He is intense on matters that can easily be blown out of proportion. So his wife must guard against negative conversation about people.
* He might spend money unwisely, leaving his wife feeling insecure. It will be vital that his wife remembers and stays focused on the fact that her treasure is not of this world. Treasure your husband and children, but don't mourn over moneytary and material things.
* He needs a woman who does not take offense easily.
Proverbs 24:3-4 "Through wisdom is a house builded; and by understanding it is established: and by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches."
Moral to the Story: Be flexible for your man.
A Caution:
Your most important job as a Prophet's wife is keeping a chaste and commonsense attitude and conversation (not bad-mouthing folks). Without it (keeping a chaste and commonsense attitude and conversation) your marriage will be miserable.
Your Treasure Chest:
* What can you do to prepare yourself to be a good wife of a Prophet?
* Will you start today praying for this wild man?
* Find all the statements (in this chapter) that list what you need to become to be a good help meet for a Prophet-type.
My Challenge to You
* Take a sheet of pretty paper and write a commitment: "I, ____________, make a commitment this day, ________, to honor, reverence, and obey my Prophet/Visionary husband for the man he is. I will appreciate his dreams; I will not listen to anyone bad mouthing him, and I will remember that I am his help meet to stand with him on all that he wants to accomplish," etc. Roll it up, tie it with a ribbon, and tuck it away in your Treasure Chest. If you marry a Prophet man, this document might save your husband a whole lot of irritation.
* How do you know if you would like to marry a Prophet/ Visionary type man? Ask yourself this: If you were married and one day he announced that he was moving the whole family to Iraq to minister, how would you respond?
* Read:
- Matthew 12:36
- 1 Timothy 4:12
- Ephesians 2:3
- Ephesians 4:22-32
- Philippians 1:27
- Philippians 3:20
- 1 Peter 1:15
- Hebrews 13:5
- James 3:13-18
- 1 Peter 3:1-2 and 16
-One character trait is Faith: Hebrews 11:1-40
* Search your heart to discover your motive in what you say about others. What is your intent when you speak? Do you criticize in order to build yourself up and make others think that you are perfect?
* Do a study on the word shamefacedness and idleness. What do they mean? How do they apply in relationships? You will find out more about it in Chapter 4.
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