My Testimony of Love pt. 3

If you've not yet read part 1 and part 2, you can read them HERE and HERE.

By the time I was 16yrs old and had been through a couple heart-breaks, I decided it was time to get serious about what I was looking for when I looked for "love" and companionship. I read an article in what was the Focus on the Family's BRIO & BEYOND magazine (now online HERE) about a woman who made a list of things she wated in a future husband. The young woman talked about how she prayed for the things on her list and prayed about the things that were important to her. Then while in college, I met a woman who was married and had done the same thing a teenager. At the time she was doing it for her youth leaders pleasure--putting down all the "good" things. Little did she know that the man she married would fill her list of 10 things until her old youth leader read it out loud at her wedding, surprising everyone, including her. So, when I was 16, I made my list. I added to it over the next couple years and prayed over it. I decided that I was going to really put my faith in God and not compromise my list--except for 2 that were compromisable to me: drinks coffee and can fix and build things. Those were not as important to me as a man's character.

In college I met boys I liked, staying guarded of my heart, until I got to know them better and realized they didn't value me for me or purity. It was my desire and heart to remain a virgin and pure until I was married. I recall once telling some guys that I was a virgin and proud of it after they made comments about me being a "party" girl. They were assuming I was nice on the outside and "wild" in secret. I was proud to tell them that was far from true. There was one guy I met in college who shared a mutual "crush" with me, but that didn't go beyond friends. I was sad, but kept praying. I settled for the idea that meeting "Mr. Right" wasn't going to happen at the junior college and would have to wait until I transferred to a Christian college for my B.A. degree. At least that's what I thought...

When I met Brandon he was new and shy. It was move-in day for the new residents on-campus and I was an R.A. (Resident Assistant) on the 3rd floor of one building. I was welcoming students on my own floor and those on the second floor. I was looking out over the balcony of my floor and saw a young man with a baseball hat on, a vest (or jacket...don't recall now), and shorts. When I asked him his name and where he was from he peered at me just enough to see me past the brim of his hat, "Brandon...New Hampshire." Shocked he'd come to a small school so far from home, I asked him "how did you find out about MVCC?" He told me he'd have to tell me later and that he had to go. With that, he left quickly; leaving me intrigued of him.

I randomly saw him around campus. There was a week that seemed like everywhere I was, he was. I recall choosing to go a different direction across campus one day just because I had already passed him once and was afraid he'd think I was stalking him. Towards the end of that first semester in 2004, I began to spend more time out on the floor with residents and had more of a chance to talk to him. I think I did most of the talking!! Trust me when I say that I can talk! (Side note: Brandon has helped me learn to listen more)

We spent a lot of time talking late at night on the second floor lounge. When the semester was over I recall going to look for him, but he had already gone home on winter break. I was really sad because I didn't get to say good-bye. Please know that at this time I had no desire to be more than friends with him. I was just so excited to have met another believer on-campus; even better was that he was in my building.

When he returned for the spring semester, we started spending a lot more time together. We would meet up at the cafeteria or dininghall (sometimes on purpose and other times by chance). I started going to his lacrosse games and holding up signs to cheer him and the team on. I recall the first practice I went to watch. He must have dropped the first 5 passes after I got there. I could tell he was nervous. Suddenly this quiet guy was talking to me, showing interest in me, and interest in the possibility of a future. We talked about marriage & knew we both liked the idea. We spent the next year getting to know one another more and spending as much time together as we could. We prayed together, went to church together, and worked out together. It wasn't until we'd spent some time together that I found out he had no intentions of getting married until he met me. Even his family will testify to that. It's quite profound to me.

Meeting Brandon was unexpected and I was at a place that I had grown tired of seeking out potential husbands. I was at a low place in my Christian walk and was so hurt inside that I didn't know what to do with myself. Brandon was a friend, an ear, an encouragement to me in a way that only God knew I needed. As my relationship with God grew, so did my relationship with Brandon.

After asking for my father's permission for my hand in marriage, on the day before Memorial Day 2006, Brandon asked me to marry him by my parents pond. The funniest part about it was that my mother kept calling while he was trying to ask me! Yes, we turned the cell phone off. We prayed with our parents after I accepted his proposal and my parents announced it to everyone who was there for the cook-out.

We were married by a Justice of the Peace in November 2006. With numerous changes in details and the influence of the Army, we moved our ceremony from June '07 to Dec '06. We moved to Texas in February 2007 to start our new marriage and our journey in the Army. I was so glad to have married the man that I did. Before getting married, I went back to re-read my list of things I desired in a man (about 42-45 of them) and realized that Brandon was all of them except the one's I was willing to compromise on (see above). God had truly given me the desires of my heart in a husband. I was so grateful!

He can do it for you too! Make your list, pray, and give it to God. He knows what you need more than you do. A list is a great way to keep yourself focused an not to just settle for something or for anyone. I shared about my list with a friend in college, who then went and made a list of her own. She is no engaged to be married within the next year to a man who filled everything on her list that she made, prayed over, and stayed faithful to. God is good & he is faithful. He knows what we need and what we want. If you are faithful to Him, He will be faithful to you.

For any help or suggestions about what things to put, just ask your mom, grandmother, other women you look up to, or myself. I would be glad to share some of the things on my list to you. Put the most important things first, be specific (don't just write "kind", write what you mean by "kind")!!

Romans 12:12 (KJV)  "Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;"

Romans 12:12 (NIV)  "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."